Tuesday, April 12, 2005

Rock Candy Mountains

All right, at last, Magnum has hit a nerve:
See what trusting christians has got this nation? I believe if you look at the stats, you will see a 50 fold increase in the number of homeless people since the so-called repubnik revolution that destroyed help for the poor.
It's shocking: according to the statistics existing only in Magnum's imagination, there are now 50 times more homeless people! What my question is: Why haven't I heard about this and what are we waiting for??

Look people: just give the hobos your change. You know they're going to use the money on booze, and that they've already made two-hundred dollars by the time you drive by, but there is an important thing to be accomplished.

First of all, we've got an image to change. When being generous to that hairy guy living in a box just around the corner, make sure everyone in a five-mile radius knows what you are doing. If necessary, get the local news over there. Please! We need the publicity. There are so many opportunities, and we haven't grasped them!

Poverty welfare rarely helps poor people anyway, so why fight it? As long as the poor stay poor, we have great publicity material. Don't get carried away by the whisky on their breath--beggars are awesome. They're sort of entertaining, too.

So please, my Christian brothers, be kind to the hobos. There's money in thar hills. It's a Christian thing to do.


At 3:19 PM, Blogger Jennifer said...

Chris-Chris. I'm sorry to say this but yes you're Ph from Whac-girl. now read the second blog please.


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