Thursday, November 24, 2005

A Special Recon Thanks

In commemeration of the wonderful tradition of forcing Indian savages to convert, today America sits together at tables across the nation, watching football and enduring awkward conflicts between rival family members.

America has a lot to be thankful for this year, and we Christian Reconstructionists, too, count our blessings.


As we sat together with a turkey steaming at the foot of the table, I stood and recalled all that we are grateful for.

1. We are thankful for the fact that despite low membership and a terrible reputation wherever we have one at all, we have not yet disbanded.

2. We are thankful for the educational system not quite forcing children to become Muslim. Maybe they'll get to that next year.

3. We are thankful for brave groups such as "God Hates Fags," who join us constantly in our pursuit for an America that thinks every single Christian is whacko.

4. We are thankful for the turkey that died for this meal, who by the way did not evolve from anything because evolution is evil and full of LIES.

5. We are thankful for Magnum Serpentine's contributions to our efforts. May he rest in peace.

6. Oh, and I guess we're thankful for, like, God and stuff, too.

So, consume your food! Practice your heathen rituals! Enjoy being a non-Reconstructionist! You days will not last much longer!

BUAHAHAHAHAHA--*cough sputter*

Auugh I shouldn't do that.

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